Tuesday, 19 July 2011

Please not in front of Fern!

I am beginning to think my Tuesdays are much like everyones Mondays.

Fern, my goddaughter, is doing her work experience with us and one thing is for sure she is certainly gaining experience.

Our working days start with my guys, so feed the screaming deaf cat before we all go deaf, feed Shy and walk the two hoodlums. Then we call at the horses, usually we can just check all is in place and off we go. Today we wanted to put their hoodies on( or as most people would call them fly face masks) with the weather threatening to be sunny. Ella and Zaffi no bother Ollie however had completely different ideas.

He ran, he bucked he practically screamed 'heylp heylp they are trying to hurt me!' No it isn't the first time he has worn it and out of all our guys he needs it the most as he is a delicate pink.

On the second lap he decided enough was enough and showed exactly what he thought of the mask by showing us the bottom of his feet right in our faces. Beyond cheeky so he was told to keep moving until he said sorry( stopped calmly and let us put the mask on). By the seventh or so lap Zaffi was having non of this flying around in the morning without her so she did her best bull fighting horse, she spun, she charged, she bucked and stomped at Ollie everytime he charged past. Minutes passed and I was very aware that today was grooming day....which meant a time restriction for picking everyone up and getting to the far end of my area to drop the said dogs off. Oh goody. They know you know. I swear I could see a gentle smirk on his wrinkled pink lips.

As I got dizzy he started to tire. Not fast enough!

We had a moment where the hoodie was close enough to almost claim victory until the whip gently fell by his leg and off he went now convinced I was not only trying to kill him with the hoodie but he was about to be thrashed to death.

Sigh.

I got dizzier he got slower.

Then we stopped he wore his hoodie like a champ and I gratefully handed him some grass rubbed his sweaty sides and off we toddled back to the van. Now to make up time!

This past year has been a year for firsts, usually I am the cast off queen I have only just bought my first ever new, my choice, not already used my others, settee. My other much admired and loved object is my carpet washer. Bringing it home was a delight and I am strangely still not weary of its tremendous way of bringing my much abused carpets back to life. Only she is lame or more precisely she is leaking, this is directly down to my complete disrespect. I stored her in my shed and she cracked in all the cold weather. What to do? She went to the washer vet and he gave me that dreaded doomed look...

Off we went again girls to groomers phew not so late now up to framers, pictures handed in( urm that isn't strictly true it would have helped if I had indeed brought all of the pictures intended to be framed d'oh).

Once we arrived ready to walk we did the swap over, Alex needed her cage back so I had picked it up for her and Alex was dropping off the frozen tripe for us. Only it wasn't frozen, as I picked it up there was the unforgettable softness, dampness and smell. I looked longingly at my freshly cleaned cages, my new bedding untouched by canine paw and placed the dribbling mess wrapped it up as well as I could as Dowis started to sink, sink to her knees overcome with that irresistible smell. She cursed her stubby little nose as she tried to reach the tripe through the gaps in the cage.

I walked away with my charges and breathed in the fresh smell for possibly the first time most of the dogs seemed somewhat reluctant to leave the van but were soon persuaded that it would still( unfortunately) be there when they got back.

Our first walk was a real mixture of personalities, young and old. They played back and forth the only noise coming from Esther and then Lola play fighting then my dulcet tones telling them to quit! Sometimes you need to watch them not hear them. Already it was getting pretty warm and with Chubby the hairy one we decided to go into the woods just off the cycle track.

Our happy quite place was soon disturbed by a slightly demonic, demented person, and his very calm springer, f***ing and blinding( what does that part mean the blinding part!?)calling us a couple of ***** don't you know dogs run in packs.....much of the rest of it pretty much went over my head as I was wondering out of the four of us ( Justine joined Sam, Fern and I) were the *****. I have to admit I was pretty please one non of our guys had been obnoxious or in the way and two that Poppy boxer had chose to ignore him. Poppy doesn't do foul mouthed men and would, in a very matronly way, have drop kicked him in the woods for such bad behaviour.

The rest of the walk through the woods we were chuckling but also on tender hooks in case, as Justine so reassuringly put it, he turned up in the woods with a large shotgun!

I am always amazed at how much the guys pick up, well apart form KARMA dog, they all seemed a little less enthusiastic. Which came in handy as once on the cycle track there seemed to be a unwritten rule that a cyclist should pass at one minute intervals. I was a little disappointed that all were considerate and friendly by now I was all ready for a scrap.

Nothing very exciting to report on the rest of the walks other than for once we are delighted at Sirus's rather infuriating habit of peeing on other dogs, in this case poor little Elsie...why were we happy? Well he obviously has a bladder problem/ infection as he had blood in his urine and it showed up extremely well on white Elsies back. A trip to the vet for Sirus and don't forget the wee sample!

As for the clean van, the defrosted tripe and the smell? Just be very grateful you work in an office.

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