Saturday, 6 November 2010

X factor

As I sit here and watch X Factor I groan. A long drawn out, tired groan.

It isn't just the dire singing, the horrendous stage effects and the fact the judges and audience seem to hear something far removed from what I can hear. It is the background music of a certain big eared, loud mouthed little treasure who is having a, not so quiet, tantrum in the corner. To add to this cacophony of sound Hugo the pug then kicks off with what can only be described as carking. Yes carking, you couldn't possibly call it barking as it is more a coughing sound with his whole body lifting off the floor.

Oh and did I mention a grumpy ol' bloke in the corner, who is actually being very tolerant, going steadily more puce. No pressure then to shut the little baggage up.

At this point I do a check list; has he had enough exercise, does he need food, drink or toilet, has he had enough him time? The list goes on and you know it is all ticked off. I know what he wants...he wants me. I am not being egotistical he just wants some aggravation and to play, run and do all the things pups want. Unfortunately he can't have endless play session that just isn't what his life will be about.

So this is about frustration, waiting for an opportunity to let him have a good energy burning session once he stops demanding, stropping and throwing Aardvark out of his pram! So I am waiting. Hugo is still joining in with his odd carking intermittently and my patient ol' man has gone to bed whether that was down to Wagner or Flute the jury is still out.

Now we are watching Subo I never really got the whole Subo phenomenon ( I still say that word in a sing song voice saying it in time to the muppet tune....phenomenon dumdumdedumdum). Yes she was a surprise but really is she a worldwide celebrity? Why can't someone with a good voice look like a bogstandard wifey from down the street?

Stop, shhhh it has gone quiet! Dare I lift the cover that now is draped over his cage partly to muffle the noise and partly to deaden the stimulous of the coming and goings of the room. No I best wait a moment I praise him for being quiet? Uhoh there are still some mutterings coming from within, oh poor lovey lion is now receiving a thrashing for just being there. Ah I almost miss him being humpy lion at least Flute was shattered after giving him some action!

And so it starts again. Soon he will need a wee maybe that will break the cycle.

Haha I do admire him for his tenacity, he has systematically gently tugged the cover and now it has flumped ( I don't care if it is not a real word it's my blog!) onto the floor and he is massaging my ear drum.

Shy has plodded up to the top bedroom to lie on the sheepskin rug in peace and Buck lies here oblivious his deafness a real bonus on this occasion. The pugs are worn out after a good ol' wrestle and are now joining in with the noise by panting in their unique snorty way...soon it will turn to snoring.

If my eyes are drooping why aren't his?

Right time for plan 100! I chink the food dishes, feed the guys and wait....all is quiet so I dash in, let him out and he's off lie a bullet running around the gravel in the dog garden, round and round he goes past the first obstacle then clatters into the patio frame, he doesn't pause he is too full of go. He bounces into Nippers pen, slides past the coal bunker then dives on the door. Urm time for a walk I think dark or no dark this pup ain't for sleeping so night night and wish me luck in the beautiful way out village in the country where the only noises are the cows, owls and a certain big eared loud mouthed little baggage...oh and me quietly groaning into my wellies!

1 comment:

  1. Well, it's no wonder you're having trouble.
    Those aren't an Aardvark's ears - they're a giant bat's and everyone knows most species of bat are nocturnal!